List of Biblical Counselors and Residential Facilities (from BCC)

Quite often, women who e-mail me from different parts of the country or world ask about biblical counselors in their area. Until now, I have only been aware of the NANC directory, which lists counselors certified with their organization. However, there are a number of great biblical counseling organizations and now Bob Kelleman of the Biblical Counseling Coalition has compiled a list of their individual directories. This is extremely helpful for anyone seeking help in a specific geographic area!

I am also asked regularly about Christian inpatient centers I would recommend, and thus far I have only been aware of Vision of Hope (affiliated with Faith Baptist Church in Indiana). Please note that the term "inpatient" is somewhat misleading, as none of these centers provide medical treatment. It is more accurate to call them "residential facilities" which offer biblical counseling. (Please see the original posting at the Biblical Counseling Coalition website, linked below).

Find a Biblical Counselor

Finding a biblical counselor who will minister God’s truth to you in Christ’s love is important.

The BCC does not currently maintain a list of biblical counselors. However, we encourage you to visit the following biblical counseling organizations:

ABC maintains a list of vetted biblical counselors that you can find at The Biblical Counseling Network.
CCEF is working on a list of vetted biblical counselors. To date you can contact their Intake Department to refer you to a counselor in your area: Intake@ccef.org.
IABC maintains a list of certified biblical counselors. Their list is searchable by states and includes 8 countries. You can visit it at Find a Counselor.
NANC maintains a list of NANC certified biblical counselors. Their list is searchable by zip code. You can visit it at Find a Counselor.
While the BCC knows that ABC, CCEF, IABC, and NANC work diligently to screen any ministry or individual in their list:

It is important for you to personally research the church, ministry, or individual listed.
If you search these recommended links and find a biblical counselor in your area, please exercise due diligence and contact them with pertinent questions.
The BCC’s Confessional Statement is a good starting place as you seek to find a qualified biblical counselor who is a good match for your convictions.
We also recommend the ABC’s document: Questions to Ask When Choosing a Counselor.
Biblical Counseling Residential/Inpatient Centers
Sometimes life’s struggles and our battle against besetting sins are so severe that finding an intensive residential/inpatient treatment center committed to biblical counseling is important.

While the BCC does not certify residential/inpatient centers, we have asked our BCC BOD and CB Members for a list of residential/inpatient centers that practice according to a biblical counseling philosophy.

Listed below are links to residential/inpatient treatment centers that self-identify as practicing according to a biblical counseling philosophy. The information is a self-description collated and summarized from their websites:

Christian Discipleship Center: The Christian Discipleship Center is a Bible-based recovery program for Native American Christians who want help and hope in overcoming addiction to alcohol and substance abuse. Their 90-day residential program offers sound spiritual principles for restoration, character rebuilding and life direction. Contact Information: Christian Discipleship Center, 24826 Road L, Cortez, CO 81321, 970-565-3290, cdc@fone.net.
Colony of Mercy: Colony of Mercy is a 120-day residential addiction recovery program for men. Men in the Colony of Mercy program participate in group and individual biblical counseling, Bible studies, work therapy, church-type services, and Scripture memory. Programs for the wives and children of the men in the Colony program are available as well. Contact Information: Colony of Mercy, 601 Route 530, Whiting, NJ 08759, 800-453-7942, victory@americaskeswick.org.
The Father’s Ranch Ministries: The Father’s Ranch Ministries is a nouthetic biblical counseling residential treatment center for women and teenage girls. It is a non-denominational, Christ-centered counseling ministry addressing issues related to sexual abuse, physical abuse, eating disorders, self-harm, drug and alcohol addiction, and unplanned pregnancies. Contact Information: The Father’s Ranch Ministries, PO Box 1352, Tonasket, WA 98855, 509-486-8888, info@thefathersranch.com.
His Steps Ministries: His Steps Ministries is a Christian discipleship program that reaches out to men who are addicted to drugs and alcohol. They believe that only through Christ can a permanent solution be found—one that restores the man’s heart, soul, and mind to allow him to love others and his family (Matthew 22:37-39). Contact Information: His Steps Ministries, 2011 Meadows Drive, Woodstock, GA 30188, 770-595-4294, timbrown@hisstepsministries.org.
The Mission House: The Mission House is a six-month residential program that believes that addiction is a worship disorder. They follow a Bible-based, Christ-centered transformation program designed to establish an intimate relationship with God through Christ. Contact Information: The Mission House, PMB 216, 3965 Bethel Rd., Ste. #1, Port Orchard, WA 98366, 360-871-4266. For email contact complete the contact form here: http://www.faithmissionhouse.org/contact-us.
Pure Life Ministries: Pure Life Ministries exists to serve Christian individuals and organizations dealing with sexual sin throughout the world by providing biblically-based counseling, teaching resources, and a public speaking ministry with the goal of leading Christians to victory over sexual sin through a deeper life in God. The 7-to-9-month Live-In Program in rural Kentucky immerses men in a Christ-centered environment with biblical counseling and mutual accountability designed to promote lasting heart change. Contact Information: Pure Life Ministries, 14 School Street, Dry Ridge, KY 41035, 859-824-4444. For email contact complete the contact form here: http://purelifeministries.org/contact.
Twelve Stones: Sometimes circumstances in life become too hard to handle alone, or even in weekly counseling sessions. In an effort to provide real answers, lasting wisdom, and spiritual encouragement, Twelve Stones provides three-day intensives in a retreat atmosphere that is Christ-centered and carefully tailored to each individual situation. Contact Information: Twelve Stones Ministries, PO Box 223, Helmsburg, IN 47435, 812-597-1212, tsoffice@twelvestones.org.
Vision of Hope: Vision of Hope recognizes the worth and sanctity of human life by ministering to young women, children, and families in a Christ-centered environment. They offer a faith-based residential treatment program for girls age 14-28 struggling with unplanned pregnancy, alcohol or drug abuse, eating disorders, or self-harm. Contact Information: Vision of Hope, 5652 Mercy Way, Lafayette, IN 47905, 765-447-5900, voh@vohlafayette.org.
As with our Find a Counselor listing, so also with these residential/inpatient centers:

It is important for you to personally research the centers listed above.
Please exercise due diligence and contact them with pertinent questions.
The BCC’s Confessional Statement is a good starting place as you seek to find a qualified biblical counseling residential/inpatient center that matches your convictions.
We also recommend the ABC’s document: Questions to Ask When Choosing a Counselor.

Video - "The Addiction Connection"

From Dr. Mark Shaw, NANC counselor, fellow and founder of "His Truth in Love" Ministries.

The following video is from Dr. Shaw's ministry website, "The Addiction Connection", and is a superb biblical overview to how biblical counseling approaches addictive behavior. Dr. Shaw is the author of many books, including "The Heart of Addiction". Much (if not all) of what he has written is extremely useful for Christians struggling to repent of eating disorders, as well as anyone interested in counseling those with food-related bondage.



Visit www.theaddictionconnection.org for more information on his counseling training program.

Book Signing Today! Press release here...

Below is the press release run in my local newspaper about today's book signing:

Christian Author to Discuss Eating Disorders

LEOMINSTER -- Do you or a loved one struggle with anorexia or bulimia? Author and Christian counselor Marie Notcheva of Rutland will be holding a book signing at Morningstar Christian Bookstore, 375 Harvard St., from 4 5o 6 p.m. Saturday, Dec. 10.

Her book, "Redeemed from the Pit: Biblical Repentance and Restoration from the Bondage of Eating Disorders," was released by Calvary Press earlier this month. Well-known author and counselor Martha Peace wrote the foreword of the book, which has been endorsed by Olympic diving champion Laura Wilkinson and many experts in the biblical counseling field.

A graduate of Jay Adams' Institute for Nouthetic Studies and member of Heritage Bible Chapel of Princeton, Marie specializes in counseling women with eating disorders. Her ministry began online several years ago, as women from around the world began emailing her for help. Having battled an eating disorder for many years, Marie found answers to what had become a life-dominating sin within the pages of the Bible. Her faith in God enabled her to turn her life around and later reach out to others struggling with the same shameful secret. In September, The 700 Club filmed an interview with Marie.

"Redeemed from the Pit" is the first book of its kind, in that it treats eating disorders as learned behaviors which, with God's help, can be unlearned. It is already being used in Christian counseling centers and residential rehab facilities. Jocelyn Wallace, executive director of Vision of Hope (Faith Ministries) in LaFayette, Ind., lauds the experience and deep theological exposition Marie uses, as well as the book's easy readability. http://www.sentinelandenterprise.com/community/ci_19447028#ixzz1g8LzV3lw

Counseling Anorexic Girls - From NANC 2011

Last month, I attended the NANC Conference in Walnut Creek, California, at which Martha Peace taught an excellent workshop entitled "Counseling as if a Life Depended on It: Counselees with Anorexia". In her lecture, Martha highlighted the need for a physician's involvement because of the medically fragile condition of the anorexic; the reality of both a spiritual (eternal soul-threatening) emergency and the physical one; and how family members may be involved in a helpful way.

Any woman repenting from an eating disorder needs help from those closest to her. As God transforms her mind and thinking, it is necessary for family members (mothers especially) to know how to give the right kind of "support" and reinforce biblical attitudes (and right behaviors). Martha demonstrated how an anorexic counselee would be instructed to keep a "self-talk" log, contrasting sinful, obsessive and self-oriented thoughts with biblical replacements which focus on loving God and others. For example, an eating-disordered girl will typically fret, "Everyone is watching me! Why can't they leave me alone?!" The "put-on" thought to replace this might be, "Everyone is not watching me, and those that are, love me very much. I don't blame them for being worried."

Naturally, mealtimes are very tension-fraught in households where someone is battling an eating disorder. One question Martha often fields from concerned mothers is, "What should we do if our daughter just sits and stares at her food?" Discomfort often leads parents to excuse, ignore, or over-react (crying; begging) to their daughters' willful starvation. Instead, Martha counsels parents to remain calm, speak to her very calmly and give her hope. They might express something along the lines of, "I know this is very hard for you but the Lord will help you, and I want you to pick up your fork and take a bite of potatoes. Ask the Lord to help you. We are going to pray for you right now and then we are going to continue to eat our meal." Then, she counsels, turn the focus of dinner conversation to something else - the matter has been dealt with compassionately, biblically, and lovingly - but without dwelling on it or focusing excessive attention on the young woman or her battle.

While Martha made many good points and gave helpful advice on giving homework, making agendas and how to approach the Gospel with the counselee, I particularly liked this discussion of parental involvement and thought it was especially practical. An eating disorder, like any other type of addiction (life-dominating sin), affects every member of the family. I especially like her suggestion of praying and bringing God into what is so clearly a spiritual battle - right there at the dinner table. Having "fought" this lonely battle privately for years, I can tell you that having a compassionate, godly parent offering hope during the scariest moment would have made a world of difference. A loving family praying over a frightened young woman as she faces her fear is far more effective than "talk therapy" and secular "coping strategies". The Bible has much to say about dealing with fear, and the fact that God is FOR us and not against. Reinforcing these truths is the best "support" a young woman could receive.

"Redeemed From The Pit" Now Available to Order!

Calvary Press has just released my book, "Redeemed from the Pit: Biblical Repentance and Restoration from the Bondage of Eating Disorders" under their new imprint, Interior Publications. It is available for sale on the Calvary Press website, and within a few days will be available through their vendors (including Amazon.com). Just in time to promote at the NANC Conference, I am pleased to see the results of the last several years' work come to fruition at long last. Below is the publisher's description, and the Foreword, written by Martha Peace:

NEW! Check out our eBooks for download!
HAVE YOU FALLEN INTO THE PIT? HERE'S HOPE! REDEEMED FROM THE PIT by Marie Notcheva • Up to 3% of ALL adolescents in the United States have symptoms of bulimia. • 5-15% of ALL adult women show the same signs.

Are you one (or do you know someone) of the literally thousands who suffer from an eating disorder, most likely bulimia? Do you see yourself as fat and unattractive? Do you feel as though you don’t “fit in” and suffer from periods of deep depression? Has binging on food and then purging become a daily part of your routine?

HERE IS HOPE!
Drawing from her own experiences with the disorder, author Marie Notcheva shows you how to overcome this life-destroying habit. No, not by some contrived “self help” system—but by the power of the Lord Jesus Christ! Notcheva believes that the person suffering from an eating disorder is not a victim of a “disease”; it is not something that has befallen them or has been thrust upon them. Rather, the bulimic became so by a series of choices. They chose to feel a certain way about themselves. They chose to start on a path of behavior that leads to a destructive habit.

Likewise, those suffering from bulimia can start making correct choices. They can make the choice to believe that their behavior is sin, not a disease. They can believe that the Bible is the Word of God, and that by trusting in the sacrifice of Christ for sinners, they can have new life—and that they can have victory, not only over bulimia, but over the greatest threat of all: eternal destruction.

This book may indeed prove to be a “life saver” to many. It will certainly give tremendous hope to all who read it.

FOREWARD BY MARTHA PEACE

Since Mother Eve fell into sin, almost all women, Christians or not, have desired to be beautiful. Different cultures, over time, have defined beautiful in different ways. Remember the bee-hive hairdos of the 1960's? Ancient Roman women thought that beautiful, too! Well, the bee-hive went out and thin came in.

Today, we are greatly influenced by the media to think that the only truly beautiful women are thin; very thin. We want to look like the movie stars, news anchors, and models that are almost always super-slim. I once heard about a movie star who on a very long air flight refused all the meals. On occasion, however, she would become so hungry she would insist on something to eat, eat two bites, and refuse the rest. She was thin and she was beautiful, but I wonder if her almost-starvation diet was worth it in the long run. She struggles with anorexia. Another may not starve herself; in fact, she may often be gluttonous, but maintains her weight by throwing up after the meal. Sometimes her compulsion is repeated several times per day. She struggles with bulimia.

It was forty-plus years ago in nursing school that I learned about eating disorders. As I recall, it was the first time I knew that eating disorders existed. Both were said to be psychiatric diseases and both, especially anorexia, were difficult to treat. What must have been rare back in the 1960's is now, for many, a common practice. The quest for beauty which likely began with Mother Eve has not gone away. It is still labeled a psychiatric disease and anyone struggling with an eating disorder knows what Marie Notcheva means about being in the "pit" and "in bondage."

Redeemed from the Pit: Biblical Repentance and Restoration from the Bondage of Eating Disorders is a gift from God to those struggling and to those helping someone struggling with an eating disorder. This book maintains a high view of God and an accurate view of man. It is written in an engaging style and entwined within it is Notcheva's own personal struggle and how God granted her repentance and real freedom. As a biblical counselor to women, I am looking forward to using this book to help others. Read it prayerfully and thoughtfully. You, too, can, by God's grace, be truly redeemed from the pit!

Martha Peace Biblical Counselor and Author of The Excellent Wife

Price: $21.99
ISBN: 978-1-879737-78-5

Prepare for Temptation! (From Wayne Mack)

Dear readers: tomorrow, 8/12/11, I will be leaving for a short-term missions trip in Albania, and will not have e-mail, internet or cellphone access. If you send me an e-mail or leave a comment, it may not be answered or moderated until after I return to the US on 8/24/11. In the meantime, read the following from Wayne Mack on implementing biblical instruction, and formulate a "plan of attack" for beating bulimia and overeating! Deciding how to handle temptation before it comes is half the battle.

"A plan for biblical response to temptation might include the following items:

1) recognize and acknowledge in the earliest stages of temptation that you are being tempted;

2) quickly ask God for His help to resist;

3) if possible, remove yourself immediately from the source of temptation;

4) identify the unbiblical desire that would be served by yielding to the temptation;

5) quote and meditate on appropriate Scripture;

6) remind yourself of God's presence, power, and promises;

7) reflect on the purpose of Christ's death;

8) mentally and verbally make a commitment to do the godly thing;

9) get busy with a mind-engaging, godly activity;

10) call a godly friend and ask for help;

11) repeat key aspects of this temptation plan until the power of the temptation is reduced.

The planning phase of the implementation process should also include strategies for dealing with failure. Since change is usually a process rather than an event, people often experience setbacks in their efforts to become more godly. Yet this frequently takes people by surprise, and because they have come to counseling with unrealistic expectations (that progress will be swift, easy and continuous), they become discouraged by the struggles and failures. When this happens, they tend to think that no progress has been made, that counseling is useless, and that they have not, cannot, and will not ever change."

- Wayne Mack, "Counseling: How to Counsel Biblically", (with John Macarthur), pp. 195-6.

I want you all to see the error of that way of thinking when you fail, even though you may have repented of the bulimic behavior again, and again...and AGAIN. The key is in humbling yourself (yes, once again) before the Lord in repentance, and when you get up off your knees, stepping out anew in obedience. This commitment to change is the only way out of the pit - repentance is an ongoing lifestyle; not a one-time quick fix!

Please keep me in prayer while I'm in Albania...and for my family as well (hopefully I've got them trained well enough to survive without me for 12 days!)

Quotable Quotes - Read 'em & Be Blessed

Dear Readers:

Yesterday, I passed the three-quarters mark on the written NANC exam and completed my second-to-last course with the Institute for Nouthetic Studies. Two weeks from today, I will be leaving for Albania and am trying to get as much done beforehand (on the preliminary stages of certification) as possible. Early next week, I will be doing a radio interview with "Iron Sharpens Iron" on my book....heard from the publisher and we are ready to start some early publicity....so watch this space!

All that to say, between work, study, writing, and helping my kids set up a lemonade stand this week I have not found time to write a proper blog post specific to eating disorders. However, I have come across several edifying and true quotations in the last 24 hours which I would like to share with you. Think upon these things as you continue to let God transform you by the power of His Word and the Holy Spirit.

On depression:

"Elijah was too hard a worker to become depressed, and those who attempt to excuse their depression on the basis that even a mighty man of God like him got depressed, are missing the point. It wasn’t depression, but disappointment that you see haunting this man. Things didn’t go as he had expected—as he had planned—and he didn’t like it.
That’s the problem with many of us as well. When God doesn’t do things our way, we quit, give up, or try to go our own way. To not be disappointed (when, for instance, the election of a candidate that we had not supported takes place) is the danger for many today. Let’s listen to the story of Elijah anew—and rejoice when God chooses to work in His own quiet manner, rather than in some spectacular way that we might have chosen. He’s still on the throne!"

- Jay Adams, quoted on his blog here

On shame:

"Any place in your life where you still feel shame is a place where you haven't connected the dots to your justification. If there is a place in your life where you still hide, don't want people to know you, are afraid of what others might think if they see you for what you are, what they would think if they really knew you...then that's a place where you have not yet rested in this truth: You are more sinful and flawed than you ever believed but more loved and welcomed then you dare hope."

-Elyse Fitzpatrick, on Facebook yesterday (Amen, sister!)

On the temptation to see our sin as "sickness":

"Unfortunately, when people believe that the nature of their problem is psychological, rather than spiritual, several things can happen: (1) in their attempt to resolve their difficulties, they bypass Christ and the Bible and look primarily (sometimes exclusively) to drugs or the ideas and concepts of secularistic psychology for solutions; (2) they begin to think of Christ as a cosmic psychologist whose primary purpose for coming was to fix their psychological problems, help build their self-esteem, deliver them from codependency, or meet their ego needs; (3) they lose hope and descend into despair because many of these psychological labels carry with them the idea of fixedness (this is what I am and it cannot be changed); or (4) they become discouraged because these unbiblical labels subtly or overtly encourage people to think that the primary solution to their difficulties is humanistic in nature. They must do it on their own (they can and must change themselves) or others, preferably experts, must do it for them.....On the other hand, hopefulness blossoms when people begin to realize that their problems are basically spiritual: they are somehow linked to sin. Indeed, acknowledging that personal and interpersonal problems are related to sin [one's own or another] is truly good news, because then there is plenty of hope. Why? Because the primary reason Christ came into the world was to deliver us from the penalty and ruling power of sin (and, eventually, from the presence and possibility of sin).

The clear Bible message is this: (1) Jesus is "the Lamb of God who takes away the sin of the world" (John 1:29); (2) "[This] is a trustworthy statement, deserving full acceptance, that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners" (1 Tim. 1:15); (3) "You shall call His name Jesus, for it is He who will save His people from their sins" (Matt. 1:21); and (4) He "gave Himself for us that He might redeem us from every lawless deed and purify for Himself a people for His own possession, zealous for good deeds" (Titus 2:14)."

- Wayne Mack, "Instilling Hope in the Counselee", Counseling: How to Counsel Biblically (with John Macarthur), p. 126-7. [] brackets mine.

How to Spot an Eating Disorder...and Apply Biblical Solutions

Dr. Richard K. Thomas, NANC Fellow and President of Mt. Carmel Ministries, just gave me a great idea.

He posted the link to an article written by Dr. Mehmet Oz, entitled "How to Spot an Eating Disorder in Teens", an excellent descriptive summary of eating disorder symptoms. He then suggested that a biblical counselor might go one better by "lay[ing] alongside each of them biblical solutions for lasting change." (Is Dr. Oz the Oprah guy? I don't watch TV but that name sounds familiar).

I said to myself, "Self, that really is an excellent idea for a blog post! So much better than that scathing review of Rx Nation I was planning to write, discussing the evils of Prozac and unmasking the corruption between the FDA Advisory Board and the big drug companies. Yes, this will be a much more edifying experience, indeed."

I am sure that much more could be said from a biblical perspective on each of the characteristics Oz lists, but I will try and give succinct principles and possible approaches the biblical counselor might use. (For the sake of brevity, I will not quote entire verses and passages, but would encourage the counselee to simply look up each reference.) Do read Dr. Oz's article first; quotes from his article are indented below.

Oz lists the following signs (or symptoms) as indicative of a possible eating disorder:

Excessive concern about one body part: If he or she talks about one body part that seems just fine to most other folks around them, it could be a sign of an obsession that may manifest itself in the teen controlling their nutrition in unhealthy ways. While everybody’s perceptions about what’s normal are different, it’s okay to use the ‘reasonable standard’ here—that’s because those with eating disorders tend not to see their bodies in ways that most others do. A preoccupation with appearance or body weight that gets in the way of daily life is a good tip-off that she has crossed from more than just a healthy, teen-like concern about appearance.

This fixation indicates an obvious misunderstanding of God's definition of beauty. She must be reminded that God, who sovereignly created her the way she is for His own purposes, does not judge or rank by outward, physical appearances as humans do (1 Sam. 16:7). His definition of beauty is what she must learn to embrace (Proverbs 31:30; 1 Peter 3:4-5; Acts 9:36).

One of the manifestations of pride is being overly-self critical and self-deprecating. This keeps one's focus inward on self, rather than on pleasing God and living for His glory. The counselee needs to be reminded that she was made in God's image, and by extension, is to be conformed increasingly to the image of Christ (Romans 8:29). To do this, she must learn to renew her mind with the Word of God (Romans 12:2). As she "puts off" the idolatrous preoccupation with her body, she will "put on" the "gentle and quiet spirit" (1 Peter 3:4) of a woman set on following God.

Another passage to discuss with her would be Colossians 3:1-3, which instructs believers to "set your minds on things above, not on earthly things." If her mind is obsessed and preoccupied with her physical flaws, (real or imagined), is it set on "things above"? Finally, she must be taught to shift her focus from self to serving others. This pleases God and will bring her true joy, if her motive is love for Christ.

Unusual eating rituals: This can include rearranging food on the plate, excessive chewing, eating food in a certain order, or having to measure all food consumed. While being smart about healthy food choices is key to maintaining a healthy lifestyle, overly ritualistic behaviors may be a sign that someone is crossing the line between health-conscious and dangerous.

I would first try to learn the counselee's thinking behind the rituals or habits. Just as in counseling a person with an obsession or compulsion, I would want to know: "What are you afraid of?" Once we can learn the counselee's thinking behind the "rituals", we can consider how it differs from biblical truth. For example, if she cuts her peas in half and eats them individually, she may feel that this gives her a measure of "control", which she fears losing. My next question would then be, "How does God's sovereignity fit into this?" Dr. Robert D. Smith writes: "...the person is living by the security of [her] feelings, which [she] cannot make secure. [Her goal must be changed to a biblical goal, and [she] must live by that rather than by her own security checks." ("Christian Counselor's Medical Desk Reference", p. 359).

Rather than going directly into a discussion of Christian liberty in what may be eaten (Mark 7:19; Acts 10:10-15; Tim. 4:4), I would focus on the fears and false beliefs underlying the rituals. When behavior is unbiblical, the behavior is not the problem - the heart is (Matt. 15:18-19; James 1:14-15). What preconditioning factors have contributed to the counselee's current deception and habits/rituals? The biblical view of man provides us the guideline for 'normal' (ie God-honoring) behavior, and change in thinking and behavior is accomplished through the put off/put on principle of Ephesians 4.

Changes in posture: Those who have eating disorders will often try to hide their appearance (the sudden and extreme weight losses) by wearing baggier clothes or hunching over. They do this to cover their tracks, so that adults can’t see these body changes and get a clue about their eating-related behavior changes.

Excessive solo behavior: When someone makes a point of trying to eat alone or taking time right after a meal, it may be a sign that she is really restricting the amount she eats or bingeing and/or purging afterwards. It is important to remember that behaviors do help define eating disorders, but the root of the problems has to do more with the feelings and thoughts that the person has about his or her body.

These two warning signs really go together, because they are different symptoms with a common denominator: calculated deception. The Bible has much to say about lying, deceitfulness, covering over one's sin, and attempting to portray one's self in a false light (which is what eating disordered women do). Psalm 51 speaks directly to the spiritual consequences of "covering one's tracks" - enormous guilt produced by the original behavior is compounded by the shame of concealing it. David will do anything for relief - which ultimately leads him to do the one thing God requires: confess his sin and repent.

Other passages which speak to the seriousness of deceit include many Proverbs and Psalms, including Proverbs 14:8, 20:17 and 26:24. The solution is straight-forward, although not easy: "Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to your neighbor, for we are all members of one body." (Ephesians 4:25). Women enslaved to anorexic or bulimic behaviors attempt to deceive those around them for two basic reasons: shame (they know the behavior is wrong) and pride (a desire for the admiration of others, while concealing the secret to their slimness.) "I must look better than my sisters," she thinks, which gives way to a form of self-induced legalism ("I can never eat sweets.") When she breaks one of her rules, she gives in to self-indulgence ("I failed, so I might as well give up") and often binges. This "failure" must be hidden from others at all costs. The counselee needs to be taught humble reliance and confession of sin. Once she has learned this and to use the resources God has provided (counseling; accountability), she will be able to rejoice in God's grace and love. In this way, she will be transformed -- and no longer feel the need to "hide".

Increasing self-consciousness: Eating disorders seem to burrow into the brains of their victims, take over their thoughts and grow stronger every day. They build a “fat box,” where every comment, every situation, is filtered through the box and distorted, so that it comes out as a criticism or demand. “You look great today” becomes “You usually look fat.” “You look so healthy” becomes “You’re eating too much.” “I love your hair” becomes “I can’t find anything nice to say about the rest of you.”

"Fear of man" is the biblical term for "self-consciousness". It is the opposite of humility - which has been defined as "thinking of one's self less; not thinking less of one's self." Dr. Oz correctly points out that the eating disorder has "burrowed into the brain" of the counselee (although she is not a "victim"). Therefore, she will have to learn how to "take every thought captive to make it obedient to Christ" (2 Corinthians 10:5). Eating disorders are learned behaviors, which can be unlearned. Wanting to be thin so badly that she is willing to sin (by abusing her body) is idolatry. Putting opinions of others (actual or perceived) above God's priorities (holiness; serving Him) is fear of man. If she allows these comments to affect her to the point where she sins, she fears and respects people more than God (Proverbs 29:25).

The eating-disordered woman may, indeed, have been hurt by other people's sins, but as long as she remains feelings-oriented rather than fact-oriented she will not have the mind of Christ (Romans 15:5). Will she choose to believe what God says - that she was chosen in Christ from the foundation of the world and declared righteous because of His perfect life, death and resurrection on her behalf; or, will she judge her own inherent "righteousness" according to the world's standards? The goal to which we must point her is to seek each day to glorify God with her life - whether she feels like it or not (as Jay Adams is so fond of saying).

Identifying Your Idols (NANC Conference 2010)



 Last week, I attended NANC's Annual Conference in LaFayette, Indiana. As many of you may know, NANC stands for the National Association of Nouthetic Counselors and is the certifying/supervisory organization for biblical counselors in the United States and about a dozen other countries. This conference was extremely edifying and useful to me for several reasons. I was able to meet and talk with Martha Peace, Dr. Mark Shaw, and Jocelyn Wallace - who have been extremely helpful in the process of publishing my book, and have offered endorsements. Secondly, the general session speakers, particularly Al Mohler (who I can only describe as "scary smart"), gave inspirational messages about counseling for the glory of God and helped me revive my own relationship with Christ. Lastly, and most germane to the reason for attending, several of the five workshops I attended directly dealt with counseling ladies with bulimia.

The first evening of the conference, I attended a session taught by Jocelyn Wallace, Executive Director at Vision of Hope - the long-term residential facility located on the campus of Faith Ministries (where the conference was being held - I later was able to tour the home). Jocelyn was and continues to be very helpful to me in writing "Redeemed from the Pit", and an interview she granted earlier this year provides much of the information on residential counseling for eating disordered ladies in chapter 9. Her workshop was entitled "Helping Addicts Learn to Identify Their Idols", and she opened with the bottom-line premise that each one of us needs to embrace: the chief end of man is to glorify God and enjoy Him forever.

Someone with a life-dominating sin ("addiction") such as bulimia has learned to use tools to acheive a counterfeit satisfaction or happiness, rather than seeking God as the source of her joy and peace. The eating disordered individual, as is the case with other addicts, will use different means to acheive her goal - to avoid pain/confrontation; not be miserable; to be thin at all costs. Jeremiah 2 describes these "broken cisterns" as hopeless and futile; but when trapped in the bondage of addiction, this idolatrous pursuit turns into the downward spiral described in Romans chapter1. As the "worship" of this idol progresses, sinful actions ==> become sinful habits ==> become life-dominating (see Romans 7:14-25).

As Jocelyn pointed out, basic discipleship is necessary until a counselee understands and grasps the basic premise of the Gospel. (See my review of Elyse Fitzpatrick's "Because He Loves Me"). Trying to change behavior is futile until she really trusts in Christ as her Savior and has become broken. Brokenness means giving up the fight (for her own idol); not trying to win or acheive satisfaction apart from God anymore; yeilding in submission and humility to God's will. Once she embraces her true purpose - to glorify God and seek her satisfaction in Him - she is then in a position to choose the path of righteousness (1 Peter 2:9; 12; Psalm 23:6). Jocelyn cited an analogy from the book "A Shepherd Looks at Psalm 23" as useful for struggling counselees - the repentant bulimic (or other addict) is like the little lamb with the broken leg, being carried by the Good Shepherd. In her brokenness, she learns to trust the Good Shepherd and not leave His side. From this place of trust, she will learn to continue walking by His side, even blindfolded, with her hand in His.

Once the bulimic is able to begin examining the lies she believes, James 4:1-10 is useful to illustrate a simple progression: what I want in my heart ==> what I do; this controls how I feel. Repentance, defined as 'turning and walking in the opposite direction', means that one will no longer turn to idols anymore to serve one's self. God alone can be served froma  heart of joy and gratitude that is singular in purpose - to love and glorify God. Lies are replaced with the truth as the counselee researches what God says about the idols she realizes are present in her life. She is then taught how to build up walls of protection against temptation to return to that idol, and/or radical amputation of her access to the tools used to serve that idol.

For example, Stuart Scott described the following incident in his workshop, "Helping Counselees Mortify Sin in Their Lives". He and his wife were joint-counseling a young bulimic woman, who seemed to "talk a good talk". Something seemed a bit "off", and Scott's wife asked the young lady if they might go through her purse. Immediately uncomfortable, the counselee bristled but finally consented. Her purse was filled with laxatives, enemas and diet pills. "Radical amputation" (Matthew 5:30) in this case, of course, would include throwing away all of the "purge paraphanelia" one would use, as well as seeking accountability.

Throughout the counseling process, godly tools are introduced to take the place of wicked tools and the idols are compared to the One True God. Over and over, these idols are shown to be worthless.

Living each day to glorify God - with all of your heart, mind, soul, and strength - is infinitely better than wallowing in the muck and mire of an eating disorder, ladies. Trust me: Jocelyn is right. These idols of self, thinness, avoidance of discomfort, vanity and attention are just not worth it. Do not forfeit true fellowship with Christ for the deceit of temporary, empty "satisfaction".

Verbal Cruelty and the Balm of the Good News

Next month, Dr. Laura Hendrickson, trained as a psychiatrist and now serving as a nouthetic counselor, will be presneting a workshop at the annual NANC Conference entitled "Counseling Women Who Binge and Purge". Needless to say, this is one of the six conferences I have registered for at the conference, and am looking forward to meeting her.

Dr. Laura herself is an abuse survivor. Those of us who have experienced deep pain and wounding at the hands of others are often able to better identify and feel compassion for those we counsel - and see what is behind the irrational self-abuse counselees practice. Recently, Dr. Laura posted an excellent entry on verbal abuse - what is the driving force behind mocking, sarcasm, and cruel joking at the expense of others. Shouldn't we, who have "been there", know better? Why do we cut others down? She writes:

Those of us who've been hurt are sometimes the first to hurt others in similar ways. It seems as though this shouldn't happen, yet it does. Why?


Many of us who've survived painful experiences struggle constantly with feelings of inferiority. Some of us were told repeatedly that we were of no value to the ones we loved. Others were treated by others in ways that told us that we had no value. Our memories of mistreatment send us powerful messages about our inadequacy and inferiority--messages we hope aren't true, but fear that they are.

Read more here: http://blog.drlaurahendrickson.com/2010/02/23/verbal-cruelty-and-the-gospel.aspx

Want to be Free of Bulimia? Then F.L.E.E.!

As I study more deeply the theory and practice of biblical counseling, I find much material has already been produced that articulates the inner struggle bulimics deal with daily - how to fight and win against temptation. This battle is certainly not unique in any way to eating disordered individuals; all sin follows a similar pattern until, unchecked, it becomes a life-dominating problem.

In one of his books, Dr. Stuart Scott, the Associate Professor of Biblical Counseling at Southern Baptist Theological Seminary lays out practical steps that deal with the heart-issue of sin (in this case, he's writing about lust, but you can easily see how the principle applies to bulimia and binge eating). I would like to quote part of what he says, and ask you to consider prayerfully how you may "F.L.E.E."

"The first step to overcoming your sin problem is to admit that you have one. The second thing you must do is to take full responsibility for it. No one else has caused this problem - Not God or anyone who has influenced you. Your sinful heart has chosen to take whatever opportunities you were given because your heart (without God) is utterly wicked. You must be brutally honest with yourself in order to begin on the path of righteousness."

To paraphrase the next section and make it applicable to those with food addictions, it is noted that BEFORE temptation hits again you confess your sin (in this case, bulimia) to God and any others you may have sinned against in the process. (Think of all the times you have lied to cover up your secret; stolen food; etc.) "Explain your willingness to give yourself fully to repentance (putting off your sin and putting on what is right). Then ask for forgiveness (Psalm 51:1-4; Matt. 5:23-24)."

"Daily, even several times a day, ask God to work in this area of your life and help you to put forth effort toward change (2 Corinthians 9:8)."

Dr. Scott then lists several other practical suggestions, including regular Bible study and making lists of righteous thoughts to "put on" when temptation hits in order to cultivate godliness through discipline (I hope soon to do an entire series on that subject).

Here is his helpful exhortation - At the time of temptation: (F.L.E.E. from sin to God).

1. Flee! Act quickly to run away from sin. Acknowledge your complete allegiance to God and put on loving thoughts and actions. Get out of or vary the situation immediately (2 Timothy 2:22).

2. Lean on God. Call on Him for strength to honor Him. Draw near to God and He will draw near to you (Psalm 37:5; James 4:8).

3. Entertain the right thoughts (Philippians 4:8-9). Rehearse those things for which you are grateful and thankful.

4. Eagerly continue to pursue love and righteousness. Don't look back. Look to your "ways to love and serve" lists for ideas if necessary. Engage yourself in giving (Proverbs 21:21).

Finally, if you fail -

"Do not engage in panic, self-pity, or giving up! These attitudes are just what Satan is hoping for, but this is not acceptable to God because it is not in keeping with true repentance, and it will not get you anywhere! Get up and get back on the path to victory if you are still serious about repentance. You probably will not be flawless in putting off old habits. It takes time to change. It is a serious matter to choose to sin, but all is not lost if you return to a righteous path and refuse to give up (Proverbs 24:16)." 1

Big, fat "Amen". All of the points he makes above (again, in context he is talking about sexual lust, but clearly they are equally applicable to ALL "lusts of the flesh") proved true for me while I was repenting of my 2-decade battle with bulimia.

Let me know if you are at all helped or blessed by this.

1 All quotes taken from "The Exemplary Husband" by Dr. Stuart Scott, Focus Publishing, Bemidji, MN (c) 2002. Excerpted from pp. 292; 294; 296.

Vision of Hope's Testimonial Video

This is it, folks....the only Christian inpatient center I would recommend. All of Vision of Hope's counselors are NANC certified (which not only means they've been training in counseling practice; it also means they are doctrinally sound), and treatment at the center is free of charge. The home is located in Lafayette Indiana and is affiliated with Faith Ministries.

The "Y" Chart

This is a visual I designed based on a little sketch my pastor's wife (a nouthetic counselor) drew to illustrate a similar diagram NANC uses in counseling clients.

As all battles with sin begin in the mind, an individual needs to learn how to practically "take thoughts captive to make them obedient to Christ" in order to have long-term victory over sin. All habits are formed by repetitive practice, and good habits (such as stopping destructive thoughts dead in their tracks, and deliberately choosing to replace them with God-honoring ones) are no exception. However, we must be deliberate about "putting on" the biblical answer when tempted to let our minds go down paths they shouldn't.

This principal applies whether the temptation is to become angry, to gossip, to be anxious, or to binge/purge/get drunk. Here's what the exercise looks like (click on image to see it full-size):

I printed out a few of these for the women in my Bible study, and several of them told me they found it very useful. Each time you are tempted or a thought comes into your mind that you know is not from God, try to see yourself as actually taking a decision whether to dwell on it or not. Will you take the easy way, allowing your own thoughts and emotions to dominate? Or will you choose the mind of Christ - which seems more difficult in the moment, but leads to freedom?

Ask yourself what God's Word has to say on the situation in question, and decide to react accordingly. Over time, you will develop a habit of "screening" your thoughts through the filter of the Word.

Martha Peace Answers a Question

In my book, I quote nouthetic counselor and author Martha Peace's response to a bulimic woman's cry for help. The quote, used with permission, is below:

Q: I have a "secret" sin that no one knows about. I control my weight by making myself throw up after I eat. I feel really foolish and embarrassed and don't want anyone to know. What do you think?

A: Making yourself throw up after you eat is what medical doctors call bulimia. Bulimia is wrong for two reasons: First, it can cause serious medical problems such as damage to your esophagus and your teeth. Second, it is a sin because overeating is gluttony, throwing up is a lack of self-control, and wanting to be thin so badly that you are willing to sin is idolatry.

It is likely that you feel guilty and embarrassed about this, but, since God "gives grace to the humble," I strongly suggest that you get help from the elders in your church. They, likely, will send you to a medical doctor for an examination and also will assign a godly, older woman in the church to disciple you and hold you accountable. Sinful eating patterns tend to be habitual and the change must not only be outward but also in your heart by what you think. God wants us to be grateful for the food we have and not to abuse our bodies. He also does not want us to eat in a gluttonous manner but by His grace to put on self-control. There is a wonderful book that I would like to recommend to you -- "Love to Eat, Hate to Eat" by Elyse Fitzpatrick (Harvest House Publishers). Elyse has done a lot of work with ladies who have eating disorders, and her book is very practical and has a high and proper view of God.** One last thing: your "secret" is not a secret to God, and He has instructed us in His Word to "bear one another's burdens" (Gals.6:2). Get help today, and do it for the Lord's sake.

http://www.marthapeace.com/qa/questions.html

She's right, of course. We will be talking more about ways God uses other people to help us in future posts.

** Note: I have linked to Fitzpatrick's book at right. I hope very soon to have my own book up there as well.