Verbal Cruelty and the Balm of the Good News

Next month, Dr. Laura Hendrickson, trained as a psychiatrist and now serving as a nouthetic counselor, will be presneting a workshop at the annual NANC Conference entitled "Counseling Women Who Binge and Purge". Needless to say, this is one of the six conferences I have registered for at the conference, and am looking forward to meeting her.

Dr. Laura herself is an abuse survivor. Those of us who have experienced deep pain and wounding at the hands of others are often able to better identify and feel compassion for those we counsel - and see what is behind the irrational self-abuse counselees practice. Recently, Dr. Laura posted an excellent entry on verbal abuse - what is the driving force behind mocking, sarcasm, and cruel joking at the expense of others. Shouldn't we, who have "been there", know better? Why do we cut others down? She writes:
Those of us who've been hurt are sometimes the first to hurt others in similar ways. It seems as though this shouldn't happen, yet it does. Why?

Many of us who've survived painful experiences struggle constantly with feelings of inferiority. Some of us were told repeatedly that we were of no value to the ones we loved. Others were treated by others in ways that told us that we had no value. Our memories of mistreatment send us powerful messages about our inadequacy and inferiority--messages we hope aren't true, but fear that they are.
Read more here: http://blog.drlaurahendrickson.com/2010/02/23/verbal-cruelty-and-the-gospel.aspx


  1. Interesting post. Poeple don't have to become like their abusers when they align their heart with God's word; it takes the power of Christ not to become like these people, but it is possible.

  2. Hi Marie,

    Thanks for your lovely comment on my blog; My mother and yours are probably related in the sense they allow the enemy to use them to attack others. It is tough, but God will keep giving us that grace we need. I constantly have to repent of anger and bitterness too; what is hard is that you continaully have to deal with these people and once you forgive them, they do something even more awful than before. We need a lot wisdom and grace to deal with our mums. I will keep you in prayer. hugs!


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